my current life.

It has been a long time that I didn't update my blog.I'm having school holiday now, so far still free to do anything I like during this month.

I'm always wondering, hmmm...what I've actually done in past few days huh? I always have a thought that I'm wasting my precious time.In fact, take a review on what I've done during these days, I've actually done some cleaning chores on my room and packed up some recyclable items.

Hmm...just that I've abandoned my novels for such a long term.opps.I'm sorry.^^".Well, I shall really start reading some novels, according to my reading schedule.I still have to finish reading on the novel 《幸福的味道》, then only I can start my reading on " middle school survival VIII ". Perhaps after that I'll read 《你家就是我家》, followed by another english novel. Perhaps I'll read "Attica".blabla and bla. So many books to be read. x.x

Talking about those tuition classes I'm attending. I've been going to biology and additional maths tuition classes.Well, they sound further more complicated as if compared with those in form 3. Such a big gap I have to bridge over.Phew...I haven't even decide on which stream I'm going in next year onwards. What I'm worried about is that my PMR result doesn't meet the conditions in order to join the science stream.

Choii..God bless me.> <..

So far the days are okay for me. I may feel miserable like others do but I'm on the way learning to train up myself on the emotion quotient.I still have to learn more and I'm so immature. Phewww...there're so much to be learnt in this great life.=]

Have a nice day.☺

contented life ♫ ~

Finally felt that my life is once more contented and no longer black and white. =]

Life is wonderful and nice.I want to be someone useful, nice, disciplined, kind-hearted, pure. etc. etc.

There's too much to be learnt.=)

Really wanna thank God ( whoever You are ) for creating me and creating us.

hahaa.I fulfilled my time with many activities today.I did some house chores,I did my exercise at the park today, I played some computer games, I watched an English movie, I had a nap today, I drew something today ,etc.etc.

I watched the movie trailer for "2012".It horrified me about the end of the world.T.T

I still want to live as a human...T.T

lolx...touch wood!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I ♥ my family,my life. Okay, I'll stop here.Have a nice day.☺

New life #

I`ve been in the mist after the days of PMR. Take a review to what I`ve did during these weeks. Hmmm... I`ve wasted so much time.What I`m glad is that I`ve cleaned up my room and it`s neater than ever.=] I began to do some house chores.

Perhaps in this life, there`re many things to be learnt and to be enjoyed. This is what I saw from my teachers today. They`re spinsters, yet they enjoyed their life and they did a lot of travel to another foreign countries. To the North and to the South. A long way they went.Anyway, happy retirement for both of you. =)

I`m listening to a song by Tank, with theme " 如果我变成回忆 ". This song is well composed and well written.Franky speaking, I`ve cried for several times just by listening to this song.It`s so touching. I recommend those who loves songs to listen to this song.=]

Back to the main point,I shall do more on reading.

the first book I`ll read.

pmr is OVER!!! =)

Pmr is fnally over.It`s a relief for all form 3 students.Everybody is discussing where they`re going to hang out, which movie they want to watch, which place they want to go, etc.Etc. We were longing for the days after PMR before and when we`re having the exam. In fact, after PMR, it`s so boring.

Well, days must go on. There`re still a lot of things that I actually have to do.First of all, I have to continue on my reading.At the same time, I have to upgrade my vocabulary.

After that, I have to plan with my friends on when to hang out and celebrate my birthday. Haha.. but they seems busy...Nevermind la. I`m happy that Leng Kah Suen felt angry that they didn`t co-operate on planning the time to celebrate my birthday. Thanks.=]

I have to exercise more often. I`m gaining weight during exam.T.T.. someone criticized me. Somemore, I get tired very easily. I have to do some exercise so that I can have a better health condition.

Next, I can pack up those unneeded books finally! ^^ But what I gonna put on the empty bookselves? Haix... I also have to think about which class I`m going to enter. Science stream or Art stream? Lolx..

I`ll stop at here. I`ll have to go to Stadium Indera Mulia on Sunday night, for the 1Malaysia program. Our class and 3p6 are being selected to attend this ceremony.T.T.. good luck for me. A place with 50,000 ++ people means that the percentage the virus can spread is higher. I`d better watch out. Our school said that there`ll be a certificate for participating. I hope that it`s not a lie.

Live your life happily.=]

I`ll start my revision tomorrow.=]

During these days, I`ve played enough and relaxed my mind.I won`t continue on like this tomorrow and tomorrow onwards, I`ll study hard (hopefully study smart) for PMR.It`s just around the corner.We were told that PMR will be on the 7th of October.I still have about a month left only.

Let`s plan what I`ll do tomorrow.Haha, when I start planning on something, I feel excited.Tomorrow, I`ll do some house chores, hmm, 15 minutes on breakfast, 30 minutes for lunch and 45 minutes for dinner. Shower will take me about 45 minutes. Approximately 12 hours will be used for sleeping.24 hours - 15 minutes-30minutes- 45minutes- 45 minutes = 21 hours and 45 minutes (ans) - 12hours= 9 hours and 45 minutes.9 hours 45 minutes - 1 hour for personal time = 8 hours and 45 minutes.

8hours and 45 minutes-1 hour and 15 minutes for entertainment = 7hours and 30 minutes. Which means I`ll only have 7 hours and 30 minutes for revision.Hmmm...maybe I`ll cut down some time on sleeping to 11 hours. Now I have 8 hours and 30 minutes.But I still have to take out an hour to do some stretching and exercise.What will I study first? Hmmm, take a review on my trial result.No idea...I`ll have to study for history first.And then followed by... KH and Geography. Perhaps some time on BM, as I got a B for that.=="

Sounds funny right to calculate the time I have tomorrow? Haha.Hopefully I can do well on my revision.

Best of luck.

"Gambateh!" ^^

I`m losing confidence during these days

Just realised how weak I am during these days. I thought I`ve got rid of those negative thoughts...but in fact, nope.I need to regain my confidence but I don`t know how.During these days, I`m just trapped in my home and couldn`t go anywhere except for attending tuition classes and schooling.Wondering when will h1n1 virus get lost.

Not nice to admit but I`m really too much in pessimistic.Something can influence me that much and just imagine how can I spend the rest of the day in this condition.I`m kind of losing myself.I`m thinking a lot of things in negative ways and it is draining of me. I`m feeling inferior again and again.I think I know why but... I really dislike myself in this way, so pessimistic and so depressed.

I hope that I can get rid of this very soon... I don`t want to live in the midst of depression and suffocation. That`s just enough. I need to wake myself up and play my part in my life.

Best of luck.

"Gambateh"

Getting busy during these days =)

Trial is now over.Good news for all.Haha.. but I`m going to have my results very soon.><.. good luck for me.

I`m starting my readings on a story book 《鹅卵石》by许友彬. It`s a very interesting story book.(this picture is originally got from the author`s blog =]) I recommend you guys to read it. The story is written in the first point of view.I think after reading about 2 books, I have to start my revision again for the real, big challenge ---- PMR.><..

Today I`ve watched two movies on TV3.One of them is a Malay movie.Very interesting and looks real. Their actings are natural and the story line is quite good, although it`s about Islam.Sometimes Indian and Malay movies can be nice to be watched too.

Another movie I watched was " smallville". It shows the life of superman when he`s a teenager.Very interesting and nice.Perhaps I shall watch the next episode if I`m free to.

Another day has gone, I`m thinking how many homework my teachers will give us again tomorrow. Phew. Wish to have a comma or a full stop for that.Anyway, it`ll after the PMR. By now, stop dreaming. (lolx)

Today I`ll just make my blog post short. Good luck for all and take care.=]

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* Never lazy to wash your hands before drinking or eating anything. A reminder for all.=)

pmr trial is finally OVER =)

Time "flies".Now PMR trial is finally over.There are many things that I want to do right after trial but PMR is just right around the corner.(sobx)Nevermind.I`ll do some of them.=]

During this exam week, I noticed that there are still a lot of things that I didn`t memorize yet. I don`t know whether I can pass those papers or not...Okay.Maybe B or C la.Someone will scold me if I say like that.(lol)

Just put trial aside first.What I`ll do after trial? Hmmm. First of all, I need to sleep.=].Yea.You didn`t see wrongly.First thing I have to do is to sleep.Haha.Next? I want to wrap some of the story books I bought earlier before trial.^^ Perhaps do some reading too.Hehe.Frankily, I want to do some shopping.T.T. But h1n1 is getting more and more serious nowadays.I`m suspecting whether I got it or not from time to time. That`s so frightening.Many people who got h1n1 died in Malaysia.51 if I`m not mistaken.I`m even worrying more than my parents.Even eating outside food is so scary for me.I don`t want to die...T.T...


I attended 2 tuition classes and 1 art lesson after school.

The girl who gave me a bad impression smiled at me.Then I smiled back.Within minutes` time, there are only both of us left on the corridor, waiting for our cars.She looked at me and smiled again. I smiled back.She talked to me in a nice manner.She asked me how was my trial and did the teacher cover the syllabus.We talked some on that only and her car arrived.She waved goodbye to me. I smiled back and waved at her.Her dad smiled at me and drove away.

After that, the impression she gave me was changed.She`s a nice girl. Better than I had thought before.
I misunderstood her.

"sorry."

=]


Lastly, a reminder for all. Remember to drink more glasses of water , sleep earlier, have a balanced diet and healthy lifestyle besides washing you hands more often.( esp. before and after meals).Avoid going to crowded places and go and see for a doctor when you`re not feeling well at once. Take care and good luck.=]

Parents` Day 2009

Today, my dad went to my school to take my report card.As I`ve expected, he wore a 'batik' shirt with a pair of sport shoes.lolx.^^"

My dad wandered around the school while he was waiting for his turn to have a talk with my form teacher.I asked my form teacher whether can I not listen to their conversation during the session but she asked me to listen to their talk. (sigh) So I sat down and listened to their conversation.

My teacher praised me. She said that I`m an obedient student and pass up my homework on time.Thought that that`s all? Nope. Something`s more. My dad kept on asking her some questions to ensure that I`m bad enough. lol.He asked my teacher whether am I good in P.R. My teacher said that I have no problem in communicating with my friends and classmates, she said that I`m doing well in friendship and relationship,ESPECIALLY the one who sat beside and behind me. ( means Leng kah suen , ng wei hui and wong ke rong.XD) Of course. that`s my best buddies =).

Hmmm. Hold on. There`s not only compliments. There was also negative comments. She said that I was too quiet in my class, not that I`m really quiet but too passive in the class . She said that I seldom ask her questions or answer the questions she asked us. Hmmm, okay, that`s a point. Frankly, I don`t have any to ask her, as I`m attending an extra class at my tuition teacher`s home. Er, about the answering questions part...yea la, it`s a fact.. I`ve learnt what she thought during tuition lessons.I listened to her and I didn`t offer myself to answer those questions because hmmm, just simply didn`t feel want to answer, or just that I was feeling sleepy. Haha. 

Overall, it`s okay la. She praised me. Luckily my teacher likes me very much. She always smile to me and I like it. That`s sweet. Well, I owe her a million "thank you"s =]

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Now that Parents` Day is over. I have to attend many lessons again tomorrow onwards.

Gambateh!
=)

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Ipoh International Run 2009

This year, I took part in Ipoh International Run ( category : L ( 5km) ) I woke up on 4 a.m. today to get myself ready for the run. Within minutes` time, it started to rain heavily. My friends started to sms me by the time it rained.I asked them to go to the stadium to see how it went on.

When I`m equiped, my dad drove me to the stadium. It was about 5.30 a.m. to 6 a.m. Many people stayed in their cars to wait for the rain to stop. Unfortunately, the rain didn`t stop but it kept on dropping and everyone was wet.Some fellows were running around the stadium to keep their body warm. I entered the stadium and registered. A woman wore me a bracelet. Hmmm, it`s more like a plastic band.

We stood in the rain for hours. I kept glancing at the phone. Ng Wei Hui said that she was not coming for the run. She said that she`s tired.Another fella, Wong Ke Rong. I sms her twice and she didn`t give me a single reply. I was getting worried.I missed call her and finally she replied me.She told me that she was not going. I gave a shelter to a guy and three girls which were the fifth formers .I didn`t know them but I just gave them a shelter.

Those who know my dad will know that he is good in chatting. He started to boast and saying some jokes to them. I just looked at them, not with astonishment but just staring. Finally, the sky turned bright. Hours of time flew. The run was on. I told my dad that I was going to give up participating the run. I was suffering from menses pain.

Just as I expected, the traffic was jam. We were stuck on the road, waiting the participants to cross the road but there were too many people participating, about thousands of them. Just imagine it.Finally we got rid of traffic jam.We were on the way to home. My dad asked me whether I want to have a breakfast before we go back to our home or not but I declined his offer. I was exhausted and all I knew is that I had to get back.

 I hoped that I can participate once more on the next year.

=]

It`s the month of June

Two weeks of holidays passed so fast.I didn`t make good use of the extra time I had during holidays. Many stuffs have to be done right after the holidays. I realised that it had been a long time that I didn`t post up an atom for my blog.=)

During this couple of months, many incidents happened.Some are sweet, some are bitter, but the main point is they`re over.I got used to sms so much during these months that I`ll glance at the phone every day.><>
All the marks for every subject is getting lower and lower and it`s almost at the bottom of Ace and B.
What a narrow escape!

Luckily I still managed to get 5 Aces.Part of it was just my luck.I` lucky enough to get 5 Aces.After this exam, I realised the the importance of corrections that have to be done after getting any mistake.If I don`t do any correction, I won`t ever get an improvement.=) By then I did the corrections until my hands complaint.Haha.

I found myself lazy during these days.I should really turn into a new leaf before it gets any worser. =]

"Gambateh!"

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Father`s day is just around the corner. I didn`t buy my dad anything yet. Opps! ><>

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By the way, Star walk is gonna to be on the 21st of June in Ipoh. I registered for it but I`m still deciding to go or not. Besides that,I registered for Ipoh International Run which will be on the month of July.

=]

That`s all for today. Do frequent my blog to check out for more. =)

Girl Guide Training camp 2009, SMJK Ave Maria Convent

After I`ve rest for a week in my house, I started to type some about the Girl Guide Training Camp which was held at my school on the 30th of May until 31st of May.Frankily speaking, it was awesome.

Many activities were hold and we enjoyed most of them , altough it`s tiring.The booklet for this training camp was originally made by two of my besties and I.Most of the images were drawn by me.=].Well, it`s sweet.

Back to the main topic, we had many activities during the camp, such as station games, tent pitching, building a gadget, backwoodsman, presentation, song session, dance session, etcetera.Out of all those activities, I enjoyed station games the most.Maybe it`s because it was not that serious and the seniors can play with us.A lot of crazy tasks were done in order to go to the next round.We got the maximum co-operation that we have ever had.

For my patrol, we spent most of the time on searching the first station. In fact, we have passed by the station again and again, just that we didn`t realize that it was a STATION.lol.hmm.The tasks were not that difficult for us. We were required to jump like a duck from a point to another and take a broom to spin for five rounds and cross a big net of ropes without touching any of them.Someone was injured during the spinning session.As the first aider of the day, I had to take care of her.That`s why I escaped from the nest task.

Many other tasks were required to be done at otehr stations, but I`ll just make a brief description.At the second station, the members in our patrol were divided into two groups.We had to compete with each other by crawling on the soapy, wet and sandy floor without dropping the ping pong ball from the spoon we`re required to carry by our mouths.

Next Station.Everybody were distributed into groups with two members in, except me,as it was an odd number of the total number of members in my patrol.I was required to jump like a frog while others are required to take turn to jump over her team mate until we reached a point.we had to lay down to crawl over the ropes slightly above the ground without touching any of it. Next, one of the member in a group was asked to walk on the ground by using their hands and another member will just carry her legs to move on until all of us reached the point.

The forth station.we were asked to find 10 stones in an area. Next, we have to wear some weird , shinny items on anyway it suits and stood on the stones. After that, we were required to do some catwalks and posing on the stones.Lastly, we have to hide all the stones again.

The fifth station is the toughest for us. One of us had to carry a wet sponge and fill up one-third of a cup after she walked on the sticks which others were holding on air.Whenever she dropped, every members of the group will have to do 10 bumpings.

The sixth station.This is the station we enjoyed the most. Why? Because it was all water sports.One of us have to splash some water on every of us when she walked around, until she reached the one she wanted to play tricks on.Then, she`ll pour the entire pail of water on the girl and they have to start to run in opposite directions.The one who got up to the vacant seat the fastest will win and get the seat.

The last station. 6 of us were blind-folded and those who were blind-folded were required to get all the ingredients to cook an omelet. All the cooking processes were done by those who were blind-folded, whereas other members of the group will have to give only the instructions to them.

About the backwoodsman session.I had to chop some woods in order to start the fire to cook. One girl got her hand injured and she bleeds a lot. Luckily the injury I had was not that serious.It bleeds a little only.We enjoyed the cooking session.The food was awesome.It was not good in appearance but it tasted good.We ate them up like a beggar.

I learnt a lot of skills in this training camp.It gave me a good impression. It was the best camp I`ve ever attended.=]

now exam is finally over...

phew...finally exam is over...
undoubtly, I`ll get a terrible result.I got my geography and history papers...both are 77%.
Honestly, I`m sad for the result.Everybody is having a better result than me.It seems that everybody is improving and I`m the one who is moving backwards.It`s kinda frustrating...I didn`t feel this stressed before.

Perhaps I have to take some actions. Neither my English paper scored well.I shall pay more attention during lessons and work hard from now on. Felt so depressed and frustrated. That`s the payment for studying at the last minute. Haha, but quite frankily, I studied just one day before the exam, so it`s actually good enough to score that high...

I used to write a lot on my diary on these few weeks. I can write up to 35 pages in a day.My friends said that I can become an author. LOL.I`m not qualified to be an author, my dear friend ^^".

Honestly, I`m really sad for having this result... I answered only 30 questions correct out of 40 questions for BM objective paper! The worst result I ever had.Whereas for Science paper, I got 7 questions wrong.
DO NOT STUDY ON THE LAST MINUTE LIKE ME.
A true tremendous fact I have to tell.T.T

I need to keep an eye on my studies, from now on.



"Gambateh"

Be happy always, no matter what happened=]

Such a long time I didn`t update my blog.I went to KL during last weekend with my family to do some celebration for my second sister`s birthday.It was totally awesome!Every of us enjoyed it.=)Yea, so today I`m not going to type a post with a lot of facts but I`ll type on how I feel today.

Yesterday, I went to ECF church with my second eldest sis before the birthday party ( or I should say as a barbeque's session at night) I learnt something during the lesson. No matter who you`re angry with, no matter who is wrong when a quarrel occurred, there should be forgiveness. Frankly speaking, it`s right. Why shall we keep the hatreds? It`s not beneficial after all.We shall forgive someone, not only as a relief for us but it`s what we shall do.Isn`t it? Why shall we remind ourselves how much we hate a person?

Satisfaction is important.That`s a fact which we can`t deny.Satisfy with what you have is so important.Hmmm...well, I`ve talked about this in my earlier post.Find out what I`ve said via my past post if u`re interested=)

ABOUT THE BIRTHDAY PARTY

We dressed ourselves white from the top to the bottom when we went to church.Almost everybody were there when we reached my aunt`s house.The barbecue session was just so AWESOME. We had a great time eating honey chicken,sausages, mashmallow, etc.This is still not the best part.( keep on reading, you`ll know why =p)

After the barbecue session, we went indoor. We`ve snapped some photos with the lighted birthday cake with my beloved sister.After the birthday song was sang and my sister have her birthday wishes, the cake was divided into many parts. Plates of cakes were distributed by my second eldest sister to the seniors in the house with respects while the cake is divided into many slices by my eldest sister.We had a great time enjoying the delicious cake with raspberry juices on top.It`s so delicious that my dad have actually eaten plates of them ( my dad seldom eat something which is sweet.)

Here came the best part.My second eldest sister, who was the birthday girl announced that she have something to say. Everyone kept in silence to hear to her speech.It was one of the best speech I`ve ever heard, indeed. She thanked for the contribution of everyone for her birthday party and she thanked many people who contributed a lot and have helped her a lot since she went to KL until she reached 21 years old.In my surprise, she thanked me in front of my relatives! That`s so affective.She said that she appreciates me as her sister and although I`m younger than her, I`m always the one who gave her supports when she`s so pressurized with her works.I`m the one who woke her up that she has the ability to get her work done well.I didn`t know that I`ve given her so many impressions.That`s touching.She confessed them in front of so many relatives...wow...I should be proud...

I`m really happy and satisfied with what I am and the family I`m living in. Life is so great.There may be frustration and depression in the future but who cares? Life is so good, I`ll never ask for more than a good life like this.I`m satisfied.^^

yell it out!

Many things have happened during these days.Sometimes, God will arrange a lot of challenges for us on the same time.It is really frustrating for many people...I didn`t see any example of a person who faced a lot of challenges and frustration at the same time and is highly depressed before and I saw this week...

Sometimes, we will be blamed by someone because of the wrong things done by someone else.If it`s a small case, it is fine.How about if it is a big case? You get punished physically and mentally and you`ll be highly depressed.If it is because what you have done, it is logically acceptable but if you got that punishment not because you have done wrongly but you were blamed by someone else, what would you have done? Doubtlessly you`ll be frustrated and depressed.Hatreds appeared in the deep heart core.

If I am the one who is facing it, I am not sure whether I will be able to stand for it or not.One thing I `m sure, I`ll think that I don`t deserve it.I did not know how to comfort my friend when she was telling me about this.What shall I say?I did not know! She is pessimistic and I did not know how to give her some advises. She was depressed.Really depressed and frustrated.I`m sad to see that and I don`t know what I shall say...she is so pity...I did not have the experience to receive a punishment because someone did wrongly ...I was out of words to calm her down...

Think thoroughly, many people and character in some novels faced this problem before.For example, the character Zahid who was blamed and punished because his teacher thought that he was the one who have stolen the unique pencil from Dolah and bit the innocent Dolah in the school.He received three strikes of rattan for that.( form 1 English literature, The Pencil).

Jesus, the Son of God for Christian died because he was blamed by others that he lied that he is the Son of God. He knew that he`ll be died but he didn`t escape from that.He didn`t lie but he chose to receive his death because he don`t have to escape from his death to make others think that he ran away because he lied.

Compared to these example, what we have faced are just minor problems.When one problem + another problem,it will cause frustration.Any more small problems that we face will make a person mad and eventually have the thought to commit suicide.

Please remember, it`s true that you won`t hurt when you`re died because there`s nothing after you died! You`ll waste your whole life you have been through.Commit suicide is not a solution to solve the problems but it is just an escape.Why do you have to do such stupid decision to commit suicide because of that? Does it worth to do so?No!you`ll waste your life! Please, think deeply before you action, try before you quit.

Commit suicide is not the best solution and not the best escape!You can yell it out , speak it out or tell a person about the problems you`re facing.If they won`t help much, consult a counsellor.At least you won`t commit suicide and shut all the programs down.

There will be someone to be sad because of your death.Don`t be so selfish and think for yourself only. How sad they`ll be if you dead?Think about it , please!

Quarrelled with my dad

I have been consulted my friends when they`re facing some problems for quite some time.Today, I realized that I`m actually the one who is facing the biggest problem.Who are going to help me out? Only I can settle this up.I had to depend on myself.

Today, I`ve quarrelled with my dad.He said that I`m having a bad attitude and he said that I`m having a good relationship with my grandmother and my mom, but why not him?He said that sometimes my replies seemed to be too short and he felt that I replied him impatiently.He reminded me that he is getting older and older, he may not be able to look after me anymore some day ( touch wood).

During the "speech" given by him, I kept myself quiet.He said that I`ve never change...the more he said, he got angrier.He said that even he was saying all that to me, I won`t listen to him or regret about it.He was wrong...I did regret...

Sometimes, I didn`t act exactly with what I was thinking in my mind.Quite frankly, I didn`t know why did I do this and that.Actually when he was saying all that to me, I was thinking why am I such a terrible person.What did he say were the truth.He said that een if I`m not feeling well or having a bad mood, I shouldn`t treat him like tis.Yea, he`s right...

I thought that I was improving...but mostly, I `m getting even worser...I don`t know why I was giving so many excuses to myself.I even had the thought to commit suicide...but well, I won`t.

All these need a change.I don`t know why but sometimes when my father kept on saying something non-stop to me, it annoyed me. I`ll just keep myself quiet and listen to what he said.He got everyting repeated. After he complained about his work and he is sick or what and finally he is done with his "speech" , I thought that I got a relief.After I`ve thought throughly, I realized that sharing something with my family is actually a good thing...I shouldn`t be mad about that...

But mostly after that, I talked to him impatiently.I lost my patient and I hate this.Mostly when there`s only both of us at home, he`ll keep on saying this and that to me and my replies became more impatient. Sometimes I`ll think why he had so many things to share with me...I thought that this is annoying...but actually this is only an excuse.

Quite frankly, I`ve talked to him impatiently in the morning recently.What had happened to me? I didn`t really know but I`ll really regret for that.I knew I shouldn`t . I really have to change my attitude.I`m really sorry about that.I didn`t talk anything when he was scolding me, I knew that it`ll make things worse.

He said that my sisters are much better than me.He said that I`m the worst among three daughters.Honestly, I didn`t think positively at the moment... He`s right... I didn`t know whether my apology will work or not...since he had said that...I decided to apologize after school, when he cooled down.

After school, he drove me for lunch as usual.During the lunch time, I said sorry to him.To my surprise, he didn`t look angry.He just explained to me why did he say so...After all, he pat my head and I had a good appetite to eat my lunch.He forgave me.

After this incident, I knew that I have so many things to be fixed and there`s still lots of space for improvement.I didn`t mean to be rude...Dad, I`m really sorry. I promise that I`ll be alert before I speak and I`ll try my best to be a good daughter, and also a good person.

"I`m sorry,dad"

Kick off the negative thoughts

I realized that I`ve wasted many times having the negative thoughts when I was a first former. I was having a self-deception. Luckily, I`ve nearly get rid of it. Sometimes, over-confident can be bad but everyone needs confidence.

Don`t give yourself an excuse that you`re worse enough to fail your work when you didn`t even try to do it. Don`t look down upon yourself, that helps nothing. You have to know that blaming yourself non-stop is just wasting your time. When you say that you won`t succeed to do your work, it`s totally an excuse you gave to yourself. It is not only an excuse but it seem that you`re persuading yourself to fail your work!

Come on! Try out before you proved that you can`t. You must have an aspiration and a target before you do something. Think about the possibilities you can succeed. A low possibilities doesn`t mean that there`s no possibilities.

When you`re in troubles, don`t say that you`re going to fail to fix it up before you try to fix it. Why don`t you just cheer up and say some drive words to yourself? That is why you`re sure to fail before you get rid from a trouble. Lastly, try to do your best whatever you`re doing, before you regret for not doing well. I hope that I`ll remember what I`ve typed after all.=)

got crazy during April fool

I didn`t think much about April fool before. This year is the first year I played some tricks with my friends.This morning I went to school as usual,just when we queued up before we entered our classroom, everybody started to cheat each others.Some of them didn`t realise that it`s April Fool today and most of them got cheated.

What will be the best lie to cheat your friends in school? It is none other than cheating them in the aspect of home works and the lessons we`re going to attend on the day. I will explain how.For example, you may say to your friends in a serious look : " I heard that Puan Chew asked us to redo our Peka Science." Mostly,they`ll believe what you said.

Since today is April fool, many people may be angry easily when they`re cheated by their friends.I`ve tried not to continue on the lie for a long time.Mostly after they began to believe what I`ve said, I`ll say " Happy April Fool" and they`ll know what`s going on.

Many students in our class began to shout and scream for they were so excited to cheat each others. My friends who are the class rep. and assistant class rep. were really mad about that. It`s irritating for them in someway.I didn`t really enjoy the `party` as they did.April fool is a crazy event...xp

jealousy

Almost everybody experienced jealousies, most of them are girls. (As girls` mind is more complicated compared to boys`)Mostly, jealousies are not beneficial. Many people suffered from jealousy. Sometimes, I wonder why there is jealousy in this world. It shouldn`t exists.

Just ignore the jealousies occurred between adults for once. If you`ve actually observed the growth of some children, you`ll realize that there is jealousy between children, too. Many children jealous when some adults divided their time or attention on another child, or I shall say that when some children are used to be the one who their parents or even other adults care of ,especially when a child is well-pampered. I don`t know that is that a natural phenomena or what but it seemed to be so natural.

Well, there are various types of jealousies. I`m pretty sure that most of the people experienced at least one of them. It can be in the aspect of relationship, academics, works, etc. When one is jealous, try not to continue to have the thought to be jealous, change the jealousies to a target. A positive thought. Set a target and work hard to reach your target. Eventually, jealousies disappeared.

Don`t be jealous when someone is doing his/her work better than you did. You will not be the winner in every aspect, as long as you did the best you could, you have nothing to be regretted of. Be happy with what you are but do not upset with yourself when you see that someone is better than you. Jealousies do not change things better. Sometimes, satisfy with who you are, but it doesn`t mean that you are good. Changes are needed when there should be, do not lose your original self just because of jealousies, unless it is beneficial. I hope that this is helpful, for all of you and also, for me. =)

Painful and Itchy...

During these days, I found myself non-stop scrabbling my neck, my hands, my legs, my stomach, etc. I wonder what had happened to me. I suffered for this every day, especially at night. That`s why I had a tough time to sleep.

Every time after scrabbling the itchy parts, the skin surface started to appear some symptoms. It looked like the symptoms being sting by the mosquitoes but there was a difference. It seems longer than the one being sting by the mosquitoes and it appeared in a multiply form, unlike the one being sting by a mosquito, one sting only affects one side.

I don`t know how it appeared. My friends asked me to go to a clinic to have some advises or something about this “disease” from a doctor. I did not go to see a doctor and I suffered. Just imagine someone like me, who really like to sleep, had a tough time to sleep because of this. I told my mum about this but she gave me a kind of cream to apply on instead…

Unexpected incident often happens

Unexpected incident always happens. Sometimes, I did not expect myself to get a good result as I revised at the last minute. I did not think before that I will get something I wanted easily without working hard for it. Sometimes, I get something I wanted before I wanted to have it. For example, I wanted to buy a book. Before I decided to buy that book, there is one in my house. I did not know how it appeared. Maybe someone dropped it and my parents picked it up because they thought it was mine. Who knows?

In this aspect, it is good to happen, BUT there is also something you don`t like happened. For example, I thought I will get a good result as I have put on many efforts on it. It happened against my will. Sometimes, you looked healthy and on the next day, you fall a sick. You thought you`re lucky for having everything done in the right time but you got scolded because you did some mistake. You looked well today but you are not on the next day.

I`m out of words to have a further description on it but that`s what happened sometimes. What will happen is out of our control and what we have to do is to do our part and ensure that what we have done is the best we could to have the best results...

Regretted...

This morning, my mum said that she is going to give the old car (PAM 5538)to the government to get some refund for buying a new car. My heart sank. I didn`t want her to change the old car with a brand new Proton. I rather choose not to have the new car.

PAM5538, the car we used to sit on when we are still in the kindergarten. The first car my dad bought after their marriage. The only car my grandfather had during his lifetime. The first car my dad used to drive my mum to hospital to give birth to my eldest sister. The first car existed in my family. The most memorable car in my family…

I did not think before that my parents will ask to sell the car… Quite frankly, I can`t imagine how will I be if the car doesn`t exist in my house compound anymore…I don`t want this to happen! However, it is not my right to decide whether to sell the car or not. I am not the owner…I failed to persuade my parents…I`m really sad because of that…

I`m really scare that I won`t be able to face the reality, whether my parents will sell it or not… I regretted…for being forgetful of its existence…I should spend more time…maybe to look at it for at least more than 10 minutes…I didn`t even snap a photo on it… I really regret…

No matter what will happen, whether it will be sold or not…it will always be there…at least in my heart…

My beloved mum

Today, I’m going to type about my mother.

She is a teacher, currently teaching at SJK (c) Gunung Rapat. This picture is snapped during my eldest sister`s wedding dinner.(My uncle , Nicky Lum as the photographer )Link : Vivian Lum Qian Ru.

Back on the topic, my mother is the one who committed a lot to her family. Even if she is having a lot of pressure or she is facing some difficulties, she won`t speak out any of them in front of us. She knew that if both of the parents complained a lot about how tough they have to work for the family, it`ll give a great influence to the child. She is the one who always tolerate when there are any conflicts.

I realised that if my mother quarrels with my dad, she`ll always be the one who tolerate. She consults my sister when she is having difficulties on her studies, life, etc. She always wills to help us when we are in troubles. She did whatever she could to make our life better.

Every of her children will know that she is interested in reading some Chinese Novels. She told us that she began to read novels since she was in Standard three. She met my dad when they`re having the same course. The game she like the most is ``Spider Solitaire`` which many people can find on the computer.

She is the eldest child in her family. She has a younger sister and three younger brothers. She learnt a lot of cooking skills from her mother (my grandmother).She is good in cooking but she rarely cook since my sisters are gone to KL...

My mother had collected many stamps in older days. I realised this when I was in standard 4.She gave birth to me when she was 40 years old, which may give risk to her .No matter what happened, she`ll think for us before she think for herself.

No matter what happens, she will always be my mother. The woman I loved the most. I mean what I said. Thanks for everything single love you gave to us. ^^

Friends

"How much does a friend meant to you?"

Many people may see this question from many types of quiz or test.


"A friend in need is a friend`s indeed”. I’m sure that you saw this quote from many sources. What is the concept of friends? What is a friend`s opportunity?


Well, throughout these years, I realised that friends play an important role in my life. I don`t know how much I meant to them, but I won`t expect that I`m their best friend. I mean, the friend who they`ll think of when they`re in trouble.


I read a book about friendship. There is a limitation between friends. There are many friends who will only like to share your happiness. There are also friends who will really care about you, they will help you when you are in trouble and take good care of you when you are sick. I didn`t expect my friends to be so good to me, I didn`t know who are those friends who are really `friends` to me.


Until I was hospitalized last year.(take a review to my older posts)You know what? I remembered that when I was having a high fever, I forced myself to go to school. I didn`t know that I was having a Dengue Fever. I was not able to concentrate during the lessons. We had PJ lesson on that day. They didn`t attend the lesson but they chose to look after me. Although I didn`t speak out, but I was really touched.
I realized that when I was facing difficulties, they`ll stand out and help me. They didn`t say a word to complain about it. I’m glad that I have good friends like them. I remembered that when I was in primary school, I saw that my second elder sister was so close with her friends. I didn`t realize that I`m also having true friends like them. I really appreciate all of you as my friends.
I didn`t know that I meant so much to my friends. Sometimes, they will leave me alone but they didn`t mean to do that purposely. They may not remember to remind me to do many things, they may forget to ask me certain things but they`ll always there to lend me a hand when I need them. I mean what I typed. The purpose I typed this post is to pay my respects to all my beloved friends. Thanks for everything you did for me. =]

I`m feeling inferior..again

Sometimes, I`ll think that I`m really funny. I speaks what I think, mostly only with my friends who are considered as my good friends. I didn`t really think of my shortcoming. I don`t know that I `m this poor in English or even other languages. I thought that I can be considered as `okay` .Quite Frankly, it`s not comfortable to know one-self`s weakness..

My friend (If we`re considered as friends) gave me the address of his blog. At the moment I send a comment to him, I didn`t dare to put my blog`s name. I felt like a coward. I `m scare that if he read my blog, he`ll see how poor I am in English. (He is really good in English, even in other languages.) I was feeling inferior.

I read my friend`s blog (another friend).If you`re interested to know her, click on the links: smile. She used English as a media for her blog. While I watch some movies or visit to other`s blog, I`ll feel inferior. I don`t really know how poor I am in English.. Maybe I can be considered as `terrible`. Sometimes, I can`t stop myself from looking down upon myself. I can`t. 

I`ll feel inferior easily. Every time, I`ll say some drive words to myself. Honestly, mostly just to make myself feeling better. Perhaps I`m really not that good, I shall put on more efforts...

Dad - the man who worked hard to sustain our life..

I realised that I didn`t type much about my family for this blog (I`m sorry).Hence, I take this as a chance to introduce my family via my blog. First, I`ll introduce my dad.


He worked as a teacher and he is a teacher. You might be surprised that why did I describe him in this way. Thus, this is the explanation: My dad was retired about 3 years ago but yet he worked as a teacher at his tuition centre.

My dad came from a poor family. They faced many difficulties during their lifetime. My dad had once described his family member to me. They lived in a wooden house in a small village when my dad was small. He had an elder brother and a younger sister.

His father, who was my grandfather, came from China. He was a thin man but he had a big strength to hit my dad`s brother in earlier times. He was bad-tempered but responsible. He took care of my dad and his siblings very well. He canned my dad`s elder brother not because that he was too mad because of the pressure of the life but the behave of my dad`s brother. He was so disappointed to know that he was unable to teach his son the moral and the principal of life. He was upset. He passed away during Chinese New Year before my dad`s marriage. My grandmother cried a lot because of this.

My dad`s mother, who was my grandmother came from China, too. She was a very thin woman but she was a very tough woman. She worked hard to sustain their life. She paid her loyalty to her husband and she was totally a responsible, obedient and well-behaved woman. She paid her love and kindness to my dad during her life time. My dad said that during the first time he brought my mum to his house, her mum (my grandmother) insisted that she want to cook herself for my mum as celebration. My dad said that her mum was having some problem for her eyesight but yet she insisted to cook. She cut her fingers unconsciously when she was chopping a chicken. She hid it from my dad and finally when my dad knew about it, my dad was so touched and sad to see his mother`s love and scarification. I forgot whether did he cry but my dad remembered it for his whole life.

My dad`s elder brother loves to gamble and he is a drunkard. He used all the money given by my grandparents to gamble. He is a disobedient child and he refused to come back to see my grandmother for the last time before she passed away. He was not a good character but yet he was a good swimmer. He disobey my grandparents` advises and he swam in the pool (which was dangerous for children). He often scolds my grandparents and my grandmother was bullied by him. Although he came from a poor family, he loves to gamble. He spent at least RM 10 (which was a big figure in earlier times) almost a week. He had two daughters and one was died because she was raped and killed by one of the people who gamble with my uncle. He passed away when he was only about 45 years old. I can feel that my dad is disappointed with him when he told me that his elder brother asked for the location my grandmother hid her saving money when she was about to pass away.

My dad`s younger sister (My aunt) was a tough and obedient child. She obeyed every advices and demands from my grandparents. My dad treated her very well and they were close to each other during earlier times. She is working at Singapore and she lives in Johor Bahru alone. She divorced with her husband when her ex-husband turned over to find another woman as his wife. She was highly disappointed with him. She has two children and she treated them as her whole life treasure. Unfortunately, her son refused to accept her as his mother and he went and lived with his dad .I heard that his stepmother treat him terribly. Besides her son, her daughter also turned against her and she had once cheated my aunt for her own sake. She was also a disobedient child.

My dad came from a poor family but he succeeds to change his life better. He is an obedient child and he obeys every demands and instructions given by my grandparents. He loves gardening as he is from a poor family which needed to make their own food to sustain their life. He loves family and he pays his loyalty to his friends and family. He is not only a good son but he is also a responsible husband, a good father and a good teacher.

My dad grew vary of vegetables and fruits at my house compound. He loves to joke to us and almost every day he`ll say ``I love you `` to my mother and I .He loves to teach and he is good in BM. He loves to eat bitter gourd, pumpkin (any vegetables and fruits will do). He loves his family very much and he sacrificed most of his time to his family and to work. I`m glad that he is my dad! ^^

On the path of life

When I was a kid, I enjoyed my life, playing here and there , wanted so much for homeworks,wondering how good life is...

When I was in primary school, I entered a new term of life.I didn`t like homeworks anymore.Everything I know is that it is a must for me to complete my homeworks.The existance of canes didn`t entertain me.I began to change my view of life.I wanted to grow up faster.

Years later,I became a teenager.On the first two years of secondary school life, I didn`t think much about my future. Even though if I did think,I was just imaginating, I wanted to get rid of the poor life.I began to worry when exam is around the corner.I avoided myself to think about PMR. I sleep lately almost everyday but I don`t know what is that for.

When I was in form 2, I started to think about the Life and Death.I had a Dengue fever.I was shocked.I thought I was dying...I cried in the hospital, there`s no laughter in hospital.I entered the hospital by ambulance .According to the report, I was short of platelets. I had to stay in the hospital until I was stable.
Then only I realized that I had wasted so many precious time in my life.I realized that being healthy and free meant so much.I regretted. Once I was discharged from the hospital, I felt so happy.

Until now , I am still learning how to make life better, how to improve my knowledge while I`m still alive. Sometimes, I`ll still do something wrong.I `m not mature enough ..what I have to do now is to enjoy life and work harder..^^

Things that we didn`t notice

I thought I knew pretty much of myself untill I attended form 3 Science lesson.there`re too many things that we didn`t notice :our Heart are pumping the bloods to the arteries all the time ; we can be highly affected if the Heart stop pumping the blood to the whole body through the arteries,veins and blood capilaries.

Science makes me realised that the nature is so fantastic!Many things exist in the right order , for example,if there are too many oxygen in the gases surrounding us, a little combustion may lead to a serious explosion; if there are no alveolus in our lungs,we can`t even live!

Besides,I realised that the importance of taking in the water continiously. I`m now worried.I didn`t know that the taking in of soft drinks that contain isotonic are so harmful if we take it oftenly.I`m now worried, diabetic is so affective to our body . Once we get diabetic,we may have many kinds of illness easily! I`d actually drunk cups of water after I reached home after the lesson!